Arab Humour

Farook invited me to coffee yesterday, then he took me to get some pictures developed. I didn't get to see the pictures, being male (contrary to what Ron says, which is why I prefer the company of Farook). While we waited for the pictures, Farook regaled me with Arab jokes and riddles.

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'Is there a fifth of July in California?'

(I have no idea what that riddle is about.)

'Do Christians allow men to marry their widow's sister?'

(I do know what that riddle is about.)

'Name two more fruits that begin with M besides Mango, Mus, and Mish-mish.'

(Again, no idea. Mus is Arabic for banana. I have no idea what mish-mish is, much less what the other two fruits are.)

***

For some reason, Arabs like jokes about cockroaches. I heard some Arabs doubled over with laughter and asked, 'What's so funny?'

'Why does a cockroach carry a flea?'
'It's his mobile.'

A cockroach was wandering about a kitchen when he crawled into the mixer. When the bread was kneaded and the mixer switched off, he crawled out. His friend asked, 'Where have you been?'
'I've been to the amusement park, but I'm never going on that ride again.'

Now I wonder, 'Why did I ask?'

***

The next joke is very politically incorrect. Blame Farook, not me.

An Arab with a speech impediment was having trouble finding a job. Fortunately, he had a cousin who had connections with an Arab TV station, and the cousin got him a job interview. The interviewer asked, 'What positions would you be interested in?' 'O-o-o-nly N-n-n-n-ews R-r-r-r-eader.'

The candidate didn't get an offer. As he explained to his cousin, 'T-t-t-he h-h-h-iring m-m-m-anager was a Kh-kh-kh-aleej Arab, and they d-d-d-on't like p-p-people from our tribe.'

(NB: Khaleej means Gulf, as in GCC. Making fun of people with speech impediments is something I report, but do not condone. Making fun of tribalism is something I report and do condone.)

***

The last story was told to me as true, about one of my own cousins. It still isn't politically correct, but I figure, truth trumps political correctness.

My cousin from Asención was inducted into an Army. The sargent asked him, 'What city are you from?' 'As-as-as-as' 'I know you're an Ass, but where are you FROM?'

(Of course, I don't know if the story was true, or if it really happened to my cousin, or if it was just another tasteless joke about people with disabilities.)

And I guess it doesn't count as Arab humour, for that matter.